Why Would Anyone do the Work of Self-Coaching? Part 3

As we think, we change the physical landscape of our brain.

Believe it or not, this will determine our level of happiness.

Let’s recap what we talked about the last couple of weeks:

  • The more we think a thought, the stronger the neuro-pathways in our brain are.
  • Neuro-pathways are chains of protein that are physically there. They look like trees. Some are healthy and green, bearing great fruit, others are toxic and black, but very much alive–they just bear ugly fruit.
  • The more we repeat a thought, the stronger the roots of the tree. They eventually move into our non-conscious mind where they will stay forever unless we purposefully dismantle them.



When I kept rehearsing the same toxic thoughts over and over again, I was completely stuck. This created a deep level of dissatisfaction, regardless of any great things happening in my life. 

I did not know how to create the new version of myself that I desperately wanted.

So I did what everybody does: I buffered: I bought more things, over-ate, over-drank, over-facebooked, worked harder, tried to be prettier, etc. to try to feel better. 

But buffering doesn’t work. 

Part of the issue is that most of us think that our circumstances drive our feelings. We think that if we change our circumstance, we will be happy. So we move, change jobs, change husbands, and after a while, we are just as miserable. 

The truth is, circumstances are not where our satisfaction comes from. They may alleviate the pain of wrong thinking for a short while, but if our thought life is not healthy, the same unhappiness return over and over again.

Circumstances of our lives are not as important as we think.

What really matters is what we think.

Because thoughts create feelings, and feelings drive actions and results.

Our thoughts ultimately create our result.


We can only go forward by letting go of toxic thoughts and creating new healthy ones.

One of the problems we will face is that the strong neuro-pathways (toxic thoughts) in our brain have become non conscious.

As we practice self-coaching, we become aware of our thoughts–good and bad.

This is the process:

  • we explore what is going on inside of our mind,
  • we recognize what doesn’t serve us,
  • we dismantle those thoughts
  • we create new ones.  

Personally, the first toxic one I uncovered was “I am not enough.” Once I brought it to the surface, a whole new world emerged for my life!

We human beings is that we can think about what we are thinking about and we can deliberately choose our thoughts. God actually commands us to do so (Philippians 4:-8).

Our thoughts will not change unless purposefully change them.


Chew on this a bit this week, and we’ll go on next week!

Do you know anyone who might benefit from this series? Please forward this post to them; they will thank you!

What about you? What are you going to do with this information? Information only helps us if we act on it. If you want more help with using your thoughts to change your life, go ahead and sign up for my weekly newsletter. Short and to the point. Life-changing if you apply it!

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